Keeping my kids in the know.

I wanted to take a moment to talk about the choice to keep my kids informed. To me this was an easy choice because I am very open and honest with my children. I feel it is important to talk to kids and let them know the truth on their level. Jaxon is 9 and Harper is 7. Both are at ages that are like little sponges. They hear every conversation, especially ones that they are not involved in. Although it is amazing how children have the ability to hear conversations that are not for them but manage to ignore the ones that are for them....Selective Hearing much??

When I knew that I had to get the biopsies done, I let them know that I would be having a procedure that wouldn't allow them to cuddle me for a few days. I cuddle with my kids every night so this was something they needed forewarning about. I let them know that the doctors are testing to see if something is in there that should not be and that I would need to be careful for a few days on that side. They didn't really ask many questions but said ok. The night before my biopsies though my son just "happened" to mention that on YouTube he saw a video of a little boy who came back to school after he beat cancer and the whole school clapped for him. He said he it was "really beautiful Mommy". I responded with "That is pretty amazing dude. What a brave and strong kid. I love that the school cheered him on."- That quick conversation proved that my son had heard more than he let on. So I made the choice to be honest with them both.

After I got the Breast Cancer diagnosis, I had already told my husband and mother. Harper asked me, "Mommy do you have cancer?"- Again she had heard the conversation from the other room. So I said, "Yes. I do."

I then old both of them that "Mommy has breast cancer and that was what the doctors found in my one boob. I'm not going to die, but I'm going to be a little tired and sick for awhile. I will have to have medicine that will make me tired and I will probably lose my hair. But the doctors are going to help me get rid of the cancer."

Harper cried a little and said "I don't want you to lose your hair!"

I said "I don't either but its going to make me stay here with you for a long time. And I will need some help finding some fun wigs!"

She then smiled and said, "Lets get a rainbow one and a pink one!"---- So it looks like I'll be looking like Jem and Rainbow Bright, but maybe I'm a wig person? Who knows!

My son was much quieter during this conversation but when I put him to bed that night I asked him, "Did you already hear us talking about cancer, Is that what made you think about that little boy on YouTube?"

He said "Yes. Kinda, that's why I found the video."

- So even before I had the official diagnosis this little boy , my little boy heard the word and was looking up videos about cancer. THIS is why they need to be in the loop so that we can be his source for what is happening. Not the internet. Although I love that he found the positive videos, I also know that there are much worse and scary ones out there. I cuddled with both my children that night, extra tight.

Every Doctor appointment and every scan I have let my kids know what happened and what was said. I made sure they know the doctors names that are going to save Mommy's life and what those doctors do. I wanted them both to know I have 2 Women Surgeons that are going to to perform my surgery. Dr. Camal will take all the bad cancer out of Mommy's Devil Boobie (This is our nickname for the cancer side) and Dr. Griffith will help make me new boobs so that I will be back to myself again. I think its especially important for them to meet these two incredible women.

That is why they came to meet Dr. Camal, my breast surgeon and they will meet Dr. Griffith, my reconstructive surgeon, and Dr. Horkheimer, my oncologist. And we will talk about everything and answer any questions that they have.

Because This is our family's journey Not just mine.